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Monday, June 6, 2011

God Is Big Enough

What a game last night Mavs!  Soooo close.  We will see what happens tomorrow night!

I call today the official first day of summer because I didn't have to wake up Garrett for school.  No more "Garrett, do you want biscuits or toaster strudel for breakfast?" because he is on his own in the summer time.  I do believe he starts workout camp next week so I am sure he will be wanting his mom to make him breakfast. Every time that I have to be gone overnight on a school night, Pat says, "Garrett, when you push start and open up the microwave there will not be any food in there and your milk will not be poured and waiting for you in the fridge."  I know there are a other moms out there who spoil their babies.  I have always made my kids their breakfast when they are school, but the two older ones have seem to have forgotten.


There is nothing more rewarding or harder than being parents.  They are such a blessing, but being a mom is definitely the hardest thing I have ever done.  There is nothing worse than watching your child hurt.  My children have been through some tough times, and I have cried a lot of tears on their behalf.  I know that God uses their trials to mold them and build their own testimony, but knowing that doesn't make it hurt any less.  Now that two of my kids are young adults, I can tell you that is exactly what God did with my kids' hurts.  Looking back at the tough times they experienced, I can see where God used it to transform them.


In order to allow them to grow, we have to surrender them.  I truly know that has been my biggest challenge in my spiritual maturity and I have to pray about it every single day.  Some days I fail.  Whether their worries or big or small, I think I have to fix them or catch them.


I am the peacemaker in my family and I have been that way my whole life.  Recently, I was struggling with this journey and I saw a counselor at the Cancer Center, which was my first time to visit with one. (I am not counting the free sessions I get from my boss, who is a counselor!)  After we visited for awhile and she got to know me she said she thought she knew what was causing me to stress out.  You have seen people twirling plates on a pole and trying to keep them going without falling and breaking.  She said that was me. I am trying to fix everyone's hurts and anxieties and when I fail, I feel guilty.   I am not surrendering my family; therefore, I am not trusting God. 


This whole journey is about: trust, faith. perseverance and waiting. 


As I am wrapping this up, I am listening to the news and they are talking about a young man at JPS Hospital, a local hospital, with a fight of his own.  They showed his wrist.  He was wearing the same wrist band Pat and I are still wearing "God Is Big Enough".  He is.  This I know.


Sweet dreams!

xoxo

Remindingus all to pray for Pat to have cancer free scans on June 16th!


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